Memories and Meltdowns

Memories and Meltdowns


January 22, 2011


By Julie Kay Smithson, always Wiggles' Mommy


This week has been a bit 'bumpy' or rough. Working on Wiggles' book has helped, as has the concern of caring friends and family. Thursday was a day of five or six times of simply putting my head down and crying for a bit (not long, but intensely grief-filled). This does help somehow. So does talking to Wiggles, which I do, all the time. He hears me still, and as we went through the second six years -- when his physical eyesight was gone -- I have come to call this his "keeping an ear on me."

Wiggles Blue Heeler is still with me, faithfully as always, loving as always, for always. His presence has simply transcended the physical, though my needyness has caused him to show me that he is still here on a couple of memorable occasions. I'm certain there will be many more over time.

He would want me to share these special times and new memories with others, because he loved the world so much. He was always ready to extend his heart to people in utter trust and affection. Through this blog and his book, his mommy-me will do her best to keep the miracles that Wiggles Blue Heeler wrought, happening. Faith in God means believing in, and expecting, miracles, and God -- and Wiggles -- never disappoints!

Each and every day, no matter how smooth or occasionally bumpy, is cause celebre for giving thanks to God for sharing part of Himself with me in the form of Wiggles Blue Heeler -- and He is still sharing Himself with me ... and each one of you that read this.

One Day At A Time, Dear, Sweet Wiggles Blue Heeler

One Day At A Time, Dear, Sweet Wiggles Blue Heeler


January 16, 2011


By Julie Kay Smithson, always Wiggles' Mommy (AWM)


This day began with me doing my research work through the night and not going to bed and sleep until after five AM. Much was accomplished, including sending out seventeen items of interest that had been thoroughly researched.

Friday was spent in doing a 'move furniture away from the wall and clean under and behind it' kind of vacuuming and cleaning. I'm blessed with an abundance of energy, and channeling that into something physically demanding was good. There were only two episodes of sobbing, but knowing Wiggles Blue Heeler is still nearby to comfort his mommy, really helps.

This evening, I finally figured out how to get the scanner to work, and scanned sixteen wonderful photos of Wiggles into the computer. What a satisfying feeling, and a very happy one, because these are the photos taken before the advent of my digital camera, and they are all of Wiggles Blue Heeler when his physical eyesight was prime. We were doing some traveling, some gardening, walks, lots of playtime, and his happiness with our life is clear. He's a happy, healthy young lad!

There are approximately 450 photos yet to scan, so there will be many more hours ahead to take visual trips down Memory Lane with these cherished photos, but for now, it's just relaxing and comforting to know that there is such a fine photographic record of our life together.

Some writing was done on his book today, words that I pray will flow into a loving cadence of a book to share with the world how wondrous Wiggles Blue Heeler was. This book will be the avenue to take to meet a canine fellow with a truly angelic heart and soul. Putting photos into chronological order, choosing those that best represent times and places in our life together, then meshing them into book form -- and factoring in some thirty-second video clips on a DVD is hoped-for, too -- is a true labor of love. It is also one way I have to thank Wiggles Blue Heeler and our heavenly Father, God, for putting us into each other's hearts, souls and lives.

Missing YOU, Wiggles Blue Heeler

Missing YOU, Wiggles Blue Heeler


January 11, 2011


By Julie Kay Smithson, always Wiggles' Mommy


Wiggles Blue, your mommy is trying to not grieve so much ... but the loss of your physical presence is almost unbearable sometimes. Sometimes I can't get my breath, it hurts so much to not have you here to just see ... to just hear ... to just do the simplest things, things which now mean the world to me.

Oh, to be able to fix your supper again. To be able to clean and keep filled with fresh water, your two water bowls -- one in the kitchen, the other in the bathroom, so you wouldn't have to go so far at night to get a drink.

To just be able to stand beside you and get you lined up to jump into the lil blue truck ... and to have you there, either on the center console or lying in the other seat.

The sweet and never 'doggy' fragrance of you ... the softness of your fur, the dear 'Bentley mark' on your forehead, that incredibly intelligent, dear, sweet face ... your loving kisses / slurps.

I still thank God every day -- several times each day and night -- for the great gift of having you here in my life for more than a dozen years. How could those years have passed so quickly ... how could you not still be here with your mommy?

I am so glad that I was able to draw on your courage, even to your last physical breath, and give you rest without pain, all except that moment as we were getting off I-70 at the exit, and you were shivering when I touched the top of your head. My heart is so filled with you, Wiggles Blue, and how you trusted me so much that, when I said, "It's all right; we'll be there in just a couple more minutes, and I promise to not let you suffer," you relaxed and regained your calm. If you hurt after that, you were able to do so in a relaxed way that didn't let me know. I believe you were not hurting when I carried you into the vet's office, though you did tense up again for one moment.

Please be patient with me, dear heart, as I give this my best and try to get through living without you being here physically.

You are, always were, and always will be, so very much loved by me. I miss you so, Wiggles!

Wiggles Blue Heeler, The Sweetest One

Wiggles Blue Heeler, the Sweetest One


January 6, 2011


By Julie Kay Smithson, Always Wiggles' Mommy (AWM)


This blog has been created to fulfill more than one goal. It is to help me heal from the profound grief of losing the physical presence of Wiggles Blue Heeler, my constant companion, confidante, best friend, exercise buddy, travels compadre, work supervisor (the kindest kind!), and so much more. Those who were blessed to meet and/or get to know Wiggles Blue Heeler, were privileged. I was humbled to be the one God chose to loan this dearest soul to for his twelve-plus years on earth.

To have a friend to keep you company, always be glad to see you, always be nearby in sickness and in health, to always love whatever was on the menu, to be everything you could ever need -- Wiggles was all that, and more. He was, is, and will always be my most trusted friend.

At this blog to honor Wiggles Blue Heeler -- http://wigglesblueheeler.blogspot.com/ -- there is now a place for Wiggles' friends to visit and share their memories of this most special dog, a place for me to share the life that we had together in its joy and countless blessings and miracles.

Visitors may sign up to follow Wiggles Blue Heeler's blog. They may also vote in the poll, and multiple choices are encouraged. A third thing to do is post comments at one or more article.

I am writing a book about Wiggles and our life together. It will be a book for all ages; a book that parents can read to their children; a book to help ripple the pond of knowledge about blindness and the miracles that we should still believe in and expect!

To those blessed folks that knew Wiggles Blue Heeler personally, I'm asking for you to share your remembrances of him. These memories will help me get through the grief and will be carefully chosen for inclusion in his book. After all, to know Wiggles Blue Heeler is to be loved, and his book will help others learn from Wiggles Blue Heeler, about loving and trusting. Last names will not be used.

Please join me in celebrating the life and love that was, is -- and always will be -- Wiggles Blue Heeler, my Sweetest One!